January 2015

Greetings! For my family and friends and whoever happens to find this, I've decided to give a little summary of my month. 

Here's how my year started... WITH A BANNER!!!!

Or more appropriately, a crappy picture of a banner.

New Years Eve was hosted this year at Stacey's house. We gathered early, ate lots of awesome snacky foods, watched Big Fat Quiz of the Year (an annual British panel show that is our most favorite thing!!!) and drank way too much. That's probably why the picture's crappy. I couldn't be bothered to get off the floor to take it. Incidently, that ball of light is a really cool glowing ornament thingie that is utterly unimpressive when photographed.

This year I decided to be in charge of the decorations. And you know we can't have a party without... MINI HATS!!!

No Al G.! The Xmas mini hats were not a holiday phenomena. Mini hats are for every occasion. Mini hats are FOREVER!

The Front...

The Back...

Funny story about this hat. I turned on my hot glue gun and before the first ribbon was attached to hat, the gun overheated and glue came pouring out of the gun. A glob of lava hit my pinky and I tore at it... like you do... pulling off not only the glue, but a layer of skin. Not to be denied my mini hat, I wrapped my pinky in a wet paper towel to keep it cool and continued until two hats were made.  A red one for me and a black one for Stacey. Unfortunately, I forgot to get pictures of the black one.

Ok, that story wasn't really all that funny. Sorry.

While I made the decorations, Stacey supplied the snacks. She is the sweetest friend and makes sure there's all kinds of things I can eat without suffering a nuclear meltdown in my intestines. This was the night I discovered...

GOAT CHEESE SALSA TORTILLAS!!!

You take a scoopable corn tortilla chip, add a drop of goat cheese and salsa to it, eat, repeat a hundred times. I must have had a few dozen of these. I made up little appetizer platters full of these delicious treats, then ate every single one of them. HEAVEN!!!

Oh look! Another banner! And my BFF! Who will kill me for this.

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Drew's had quite an interesting January as well. He decided to use his Xmas bonus to purchase an item he'd been dreaming of owning for years.

A telescope that takes up half my living room.

  

Drew has had a love of space-stuff all his life. His infactuation of astrophysicist and Nova overlord Neil deGrasse Tyson is nothing short of stalkerish. The only thing keeping Drew from standing outside the Hayden Planetarium with a boombox playing "In Your Eyes" is boobs. I have them; HRH Tyson does not.  And that's where the bromance dies.

While I may not understand the whole telescope obsession thing, I do support my hubby's hobbies. He's been desperate to take the telescope outside and use it, but there is no way we're standing outside in zero degree weather to look at something I can google. So, we hauled it upstairs to the front room and Drew can look out the skylight instead. It's not as impressive as viewing the Milky Way on a pitch-black country road in the middle of nowhere, but at least he can use his toy now without the threat of frostbite.

I will admit, it was really neat to watch the clouds (or whatever they are) on Jupiter spin. Yes, that huge tube of mirrors and lenses can capture Jupiter close enough that you can watch stuff spinning. Creepy cool.

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Sweetpea would like to report that January sucks.

This is how she tells us to turn up the heat. Completely covering a heat register.

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Mardi Gras is coming up next month!!! So I made a wreath.

I did not injure myself making this, but Stacey got a huge blister making hers. She's more dangerous with the glue gun than I am!

See Mom! I used the feathers!!!

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And finally, we end this month with something Drew and I have talked about doing for quite a while.

We switched the dining room and offices around.

The hoosier (including all my glorious Crockpots), wine rack, beer-making center, and table came out into the former office area.

We put up the lighted wife shelving we used a craft shows and put the beer on it. It's only lit up for the photo. I don't keep it on. So don't freak out. There's no beer in the bottles at the moment anyway. Eventually there will be curtains that wrap around it to keep light out. That room's pretty dark anyway.

Now for the craft room/office...

I loaded up the now vacant wire rack in the craft room with my supplies.

My new office!!

I love it! I've got a cork board over my desk to pin up things I need for the book --- original artwork for the covers, trinkets from my last trip to Boston, articles about other writers, a signed picture of Oded Fehr from The Mummy (super squee!!!), and a note a fan sent that inspires me to keep going (even though I seem to have stopped at the moment).

On the side wall, I have a poster from Rifftrax Live! Godzilla. My most favoritest Rifftrax Live! event ever, and my second most favorite Rifftrax movie. My first favorite is Birdemic.

Drew's desk was moved into the room. Looks cramped, but it's not. He's very happy with it. And no, he's not just saying that because of the boobs-thing. Sweetpea's bed has moved to the top of the freezer. She likes it there because the other cats don't bug her. (I'm pretty sure they haven't found her yet.)

And finally, this thing in the middle of the room. It's not completed yet, but it will be a workstation. A crafting island for card making, mini hat construction, and wreath decorating. It's missing a top, so I haven't filled the bookshelves yet in case we need to move them. I'm still debating what to put on top. A thick laminated slab costs over $200. Probably more. I've decided to review all my options at this point in time.

So, that's January. I won't bore you with resolutions and all that gunk. Mostly because I didn't make any. I've decided to adopt life-mottos instead.

#1  Keep an open mind.

#2  Don't be rude.

#3  If you want it done, get up and do it. 

And number three applies to anything and everything. Dieting. Exercise. Decreasing debt. Moving some rooms in the house. I worked relentlessly from 5:10pm Friday until 9pm Saturday night to get this done. Drew was with me most of the way. I am kick-ass.

#4  Be the Brightest Star in your own Universe.

~Steph

World's Most Boring Review of 2014

All the blogs I subscribe to have posted reviews of the year 2014. Of course, the blogs I subscribe to are far more professional than I will ever be. (Or ever want to be.) I like to think that my writing style is a niche all unto its own. I call it, "Honesty and bleep words that I won't be ashamed of years from now." Because, believe me, there are lots of things I could say (and have said in private) about my fellow (wo)man, but I refrain from doing so on the internet. My decision is because I hate when negativity is spewed unto the masses. I try to find the positive in everything and to keep life light. So I try not to do the same thing here.

Unless it's funny. In comedy, all bets are off. If you find something I say offensive, then chances are you're a dower prude with no sense of humor and you should probably just kill yourself. (Like that --- THAT was funny. So laugh, damn you, laugh as if your life depends on it!!!!!)

In typical Stephanie fashion, here's my (previously unwritten about) year 2014 in review...

Grandma died on February 18, 2014

Not the way you want to start out the new year, but that's life for ya! That photo was taken in May when the ground had softened and she could be buried. Someone suggested I take a picture for my parents, who could not come up for the actual burial. Seemed a bit sick. But I'm glad I did because it's a nice reminder of how beautiful a day it was. Grandma would have been appalled that we'd spent it in a cemetery burying her.

Dorothy Jean Vannais McLean was an amazingly creative individual imbued with a myriad of crazy issues, a number of which I have inherited. I am the brain of an Emerson-Vannais in the body of a Deal. I have been gratefully cursed...

To see a web album full of pics of Grandma over the years, click on the below.

Grandma

Yes - that's me and my Grandmother. 

No - no one in my family likes wearing pants. 

And, again, no - I'm not wearing them even as I type this. Ha. Ha.

Birthday Dinner Trip in Alex Bay

You:  Whoa! Skipping from February to August???
Me:  Yeah. You got a problem with that?
You:  No. I guess not. Lead on.

For my birthday in August, Drew had a surprise for me.

~ A dinner cruise on Alex Bay ~ 

We had a fantastic time! The dinner was okay. The cruise was amazing! A young singer, accompanied by his guitar and a great sound system, sang on the top deck where we sat for the majority of the ride. The view was glorious and the atmosphere relaxing. I highly recommend it to everyone to do once in their life with the person they love. (Yes, I can be that sappy sometimes.)

Just make sure you turn your phone off. The roaming charges to Canada are outrageous. And yes, your phone will at some point think you skipped the country. ;)

Alex Bay Birthday Dinner Cruise 2014

Drew went to get me wine from the bar. 
He came back with the wine version of a Little Hug. 
Honestly, the wine was crap... but the Little Hug was so cute!!!


Scharoun Family Vacation to Myrtle Beach in September 2014

In September, Drew and I booked the company's big condo in Myrtle Beach and invited his family to come on vacation with us. I was nervous as all get-out.

1.  I'm not a cook.
2.  I don't like playing on the beach. (But I love to look at it and hear it.)
3.  I don't like kids...usually.
4.  I have no idea what I'm doing anymore.

My fears were completely unfounded. As it turns out, nobody else cares about any of that either! The first thing my mother-in-law said was, "We're gonna eat out, right? I don't want to cook." I LOVE THIS WOMAN!!! The nephews were a riot without being annoying. (Believe it or not, I like to watch them playing video games. I could watch them play Arkham City for hours! I even help them cheat when they're stuck. I am the cool google Aunt!) And the weather was good enough that the beach-dwellers got to enjoy themselves.

I'm so grateful his family could go with us. Drew and I got to share our company's amazing generosity (and possibly be impressive for once. *wink*). It was so incredibly cool and we have a fantastic time!! You can see the incriminating evidence pictures by clicking on the below.

Myrtle Beach 2014

Brother-in-law Peter, mother-in-law Robyn, and hubby Drew. 
After all these years, she still has to split them up.


Halloween at the Pennsylvania Renaissance Faire

Drew and I had the pleasure of re-visiting the Pennsylvania Renaissance Faire this year. We picked mid-October and we went with the Gilfus sisters! Like us, Stacey and Shelly are Renfest enthusiasts and love a good adventure. This was an adventure not to be missed!!!

We tried Scotch Eggs!!!
    You don't talk about Scotch Egg Club!!! (Inside joke -- sorry.)
We took part in a pirate auction. 
    I bid on and won a sword! Argh!!!
We found a new band we love --- Tartanic. Whose very name makes a certain unnamed party member swoon with delight.
    No! It's not Drew!!

Pennsylvania Renaissance Faire - Oct 2014

Isn't he dashing??? I just adore him in his costume.


Halloween with the Syracuse Crunch

In case I haven't said this before... I hate kids. So, it should come as no surprise that Drew and I have no interest in passing out free candy to the ungrateful future-felons of America. Each year we try to find something else to do. This year we went to see the Syracuse Crunch take on the Rochester Amerks.

Or more accurately, see the Syracuse Crunch get their asses handed to them by the Rochester Amerks. The Crunch lost 3-0.

BUT!!! We did have a great time.

Syracuse fans dress up for Halloween. My fave costume was the blind ref.

And look!!! The Hanson's are still there!!! (If you have no idea what I'm talking about, watch the movie "Slapshot," starring Paul Newman. And furthermore, if you thought I was referring to the band "Hanson," we are no longer friends.)

Another thing that makes a hockey game great??? BEER! Molson's, to be precise. Plus, the Memorial serves Beak & Skiff Hard Cider. Noms all around!!!!


November Wine Trail Trip

My cousins the Ottleys invited us to go on a trip along the wine trail with them and several friends in a limo bus. I, of course, said, "HELL YEAH!!!!!!"

We had sooooooo much fun. I have pictures, but they are all blurry. I wonder why???


Christmas Eve

We end this year pretty much where we began. With deceased grandparents.

On Christmas Eve --- after the office luncheon --- after the gift exchanges --- after everything had quieted down --- Drew and I made a little trek to the Owasco Rural Cemetery to put a little wreath on Grandma and Grandma McLean's grave. Grandma used to do this and I decided it was something I wanted to do.

Afterwards, we went to Sand Hill Cemetery in Dresserville to put a wreath on Grandma and Grandpa Searls headstone. I hadn't told my mother I was doing this for her parents. When I emailed her the picture later that day, it was a surprise that made her cry.

The cemetery isn't nearly as far away as I remember as a kid. I will have to visit much more often.

This may very well be my new Christmas Eve tradition. Go to work. Leave at 11. Go to Springside and celebrate Christmas with my fellow employees by stuffing our faces with cheese souffle. Go to the cemetery and wish my Grandparents a Merry Christmas. Go home and nap until New Years. Swear we'll never eat that much cheese souffle again!

Next year, I think I'll add a trip Christmas Eve Night to Tina and Rob's house to party with the Ottleys. They're crazy as heck and they're my family so they have to accept me! HAHAHAHA!!!

Happy Belated New Years.
Steph

Poetry: i really need a cigarette

I haven't written much poetry, but a couple times I've inspired to jot down a line or two. The below was written around 2002. I was working at MONY in downtown Syracuse. It was a horrible job with a horrible manager and her back-stabbing, arse-kissing lackey. The rest of my co-workers were amazing, and we had some really good laughs over the 5 years I worked there. 

Unfortunately, I've lost track of my close friends there. As has happened many times to me throughout my life. Partially out of lack of communication; partially out of lack of memory. (I should probably have that checked someday.)

I wrote this one dull afternoon from my cubicle. Incidently, I would still love to find this bar, even though I no longer really need a cigarette. If New York State hadn't banned smoking in bars, it might be a different story...

i really need a cigarette

i need a cigarette.

i won't have one.

but i'd really like one.

and an ice cold labatts.

labatts blue.

in a glass.

with two ice cubes.

while sitting in a dark bar.

the kind with a nice bartender who reminds you of your uncle.

your cool uncle, that is.

he refills the peanut bowl.

i refill the ashtray.

there's a lame football game on the tube.

miami's getting beat.

by --- whoever --- as long as miami's getting beat.

there's a guy at the end of the bar telling bad jokes.

he hates his home too.

keeps complaining that his wife likes line dancing too much.

he's thinking about buying her a bedazzler for christmas.

(not sure if he's making a joke or not).

there's an old barmaid waiting on a young couple in the corner table.

they ordered burgers and fries.

it's their third date.

she wonders if she'll give it up.

he wonders if she'll give it up.

the waitress wonders if she'll get anything for this effort too.

the clock reads three thirty-seven.

i really need a cigarette.

Mini Hats

I've been making mini hats lately. I love hats, but I do not have a "hat face." But anyone can wear a mini hat!

The first two hats are Doctor Who themed. The Tardis is a solid metal charm and it's very heavy. The band and dots are meant to represent the Dalek. And the large pearls in the center of the flowers are the Ood spheres.

Then I made three Christmas hats.

What do I plan to do with these hats? No idea. I just love making them! I plan to get more supplies and start making mini hats for other holidays and seasons.

~Steph

Book Cover Reveal!!!

There she is! The cover for book #2 in The Lyssa Winfield Mystery Series. It's busy, I know. A real publisher would lose their mind if they were presented with that. I don't care. It's my books and I love the covers. I'm not focused on becoming a best-selling author. Just an author who loves her own work.

The back cover is done as well. Like the front cover, the back cover is similar to the one on the first book. I'd post it here, but the tiny writing will make you go blind. Instead, here's some inspirational pics along with the book summary from the back cover.

Lyssa Winfield

Purveyor of purses, hoarder of shoes, leader of nerds. CEO Bryan Markison’s favorite production manager in charge of his modest video game empire is a workaholic who’s recently found herself in a new relationship with the man of her daydreams. Constantly juggling work with pleasure in a valiant attempt to neglect neither her career nor her personal life, Lyssa’s magical feats of time management will be for nothing if her beau isn’t around to appreciate it. She barely has enough time to find a Halloween costume, much less squeeze in a dinner date with…

Alex Dane

The epitome of tall, dark, and handsome, this Markison Industries security specialist has just returned from a tense business trip in the Middle East and back into the arms of his sexy girlfriend in Boston. Adjusting to “normal” life isn’t easy for the covert op who is used to years of solitude. If he isn’t being inundated with late-night surveillance jobs, co-workers interrupting his invaluable private time, and nagging doubts accompanied by unreasonable fits of jealousy, then he’s having to compete for his girl’s attention with…

Sean Webber

When the recent murder of a college student is linked to online gaming activity, this Boston Police Detective reaches out to Mutation 2: Evolutionary Divide’s production manager for her assistance in solving the case. As this dashing knight in shining Armani gets closer to Alex’s princess, Lyssa finds her kingdom in turmoil. The introduction of a potential rival brings out a desperate side to Alex that makes Lyssa question if she wants to continue in this relationship.

Who is murdering the students? Who will win the battle for Lyssa’s heart? Will Simon have the expansion pack monster designs done by the deadline, or will he fail and suffer Lyssa’s wrath? And who keeps leaving crates of office supplies on Alex’s desk???

This is the second book in the Lyssa Winfield Murder Series.

This book contains adult situations and is intended for mature audiences with a good sense of humor only.

SQUEE!!!!!!

~Steph

At my mother's request --- CARDS!

I haven't posted any cards in a while. Mostly because I've been really lazy about taking pictures of them. Drew just recently setup our photo tent with lights in the front storage room so it'll be ready to use anytime I want to take photos. 

WARNING: I'm still learning to use the photo tent and camera. So these photos aren't the best. But they are A LOT better than what I used to take.

This past summer, Stampin' Up came out with new Blendabilities markers. They're alcohol ink markers, which I'd never used before. I bought all the colors they offered and went to town coloring. I can't "blend" for caca with the dang things, but I can color better than any third grader on the planet. I'm pretty sure I enjoy it more too. Love these things!!!

The below collection of pictures come from a wonderful little website Free Dearie Dolls Digi Stamps.

I'll start with a couple summer cards to remind us all of what we miss.

Now here's some Halloween cards, because that's two holidays ago. Makes sense!

I made some love cards...

I love those mousies!!!!

I "painted" a Paris card. The picture is an ink drawing by Seth Swilk. 

Below is a map I colored. I used the World Map stamp from Stampin' Up.

I did the next card in several different colors. I used the Blended Bloom stamp from Stampin' Up.

I made several of the below using a technique I learned in a card class with my Stampin' Up rep Jessica Brigden. The flower centers are sticky pearls that are colored by the alcohol ink markers to match the card. Yes, the markers can color pearls as well as sticky gems. So cool!!

Some colorful Buddhas. The stamp is from Inkadinkadoo.

SPOILER ALERT!!!!!  2014 CHRISTMAS CARDS AHEAD!!!!!

There's a chance if you get a Christmas Card from me this year, it might be one of the cards below. Consider yourself warned. If you don't want to see it before you get it, turn back now.

THE NUTCRACKER

I cut out the nutcracker with my Silhouette. He's perched on a piece of red glimmer paper. The background is gold ink stamped on black paper. The stamp set is Bright & Beautiful Stars from Stampin' Up. It is so much more cooler and shinier in person.

FLOURISHED RUDOLPH

Rudolph was cut out with my Silhouette. He's on top of gold glimmer paper. The paper behind that is from Stampin' Up. I don't remember the name of the DSP pack, but I think it might be retired anyway. 

SANTA'S FLIGHT

This is all Stampin' Up. From the current holiday catalog, I used stamp sets Holiday Home, Festival of Trees, and White Christmas. It's missing something in the upper right-hand corner, but I don't have anything to put there I like, so it might just go as is.

Now you're up-to-date with my card making. I expect to make Xmas cards this year. I also expect to be debt-free and a size 8 when I wake up in the morning, so take that into consideration when I mention my dreams, goals, and expectations.

~ Steph

About That Damn Book...

This originally started off as a Facebook post, but it got stupidly long (like this sentence is turning out to be), so I decided to make it a blog post instead.

To my fans: You have been so patient and understanding, and I appreciate you all so much. But that book ain't comin' out before New Years. I'm sorry. I've hit a HUGE problem with it and instead of just patching the hole and publishing something I'm not 100% happy with (I'm a writer - will I ever be 100% happy with anything????), I've decided to give myself a break. 

I know! I keep making promises that the book will come out.  But I tried! I really did! Ask Drew. I've been making him bonkers talking about it. And it's been eating me up that I can't get it done before Xmas. So much so, that I have got nothing else done. I've got to stop and step back from it.

There's also a chance that after posting this my creativity will burst with a fantastical idea. That's happened before. It happens a lot at work just after I email the bosses. 

   "Dudes! We are so screwed!" 

Five seconds later...

   "Oh, nevermind boss dudes. I figured it out. Abort the self-destruct sequence. Thanks."

Not to mention the fact that my accountant is going to give me that look again next spring when it's tax time and he's going through the 1099s.

   "$4.58 from Amazon."

   "Pathetic, I know. I didn't publish a book this year."

   "You said you were going to."

   "I know."

   "Are you sure you're a writer?

   "Yes! I am!"

   "Uh huh."

   "I am!!!"

   "You know, making a profit isn't a bad thing."

   "I promise I'll do it this year!!!"

   "Uh huh."

   "I will! By the way, what's a profit?"

I am happy to report that the book is 75% done. When will the rest be done? Don't know. Not even going to give an estimated guess. It's about 16 months overdue at this point, so there's no sense in me telling you anything. But a lot of it is done, so that's good, right???

Yeah, I know. I deserve that.

Oh, and the cover is done. I'll be revealing that this week along with the back cover synopsis. Something to look forward to.

So, if you'll forgive me, I'm going to step away from this computer and go make some holiday cheer. Put together some cards. Maybe play a video game with the hubby. I haven't played House of the Dead in a while. Or maybe I'll just get out of this darn house before I go insane!!!!

In the meantime, here's a couple pics I found that gave me some inspiration for a few of the scenes from the book...

And finally... did you ever notice that guys make the same face no matter what size gun they're shooting off? Huh.

Maybe I'll go watch The Mummy.

~Steph